Stuff Not To Tell Black People 1: Fried Chicken?


A very brief history

White people didn’t call out a national town-hall day to unanimously decide what names to call black people, you know, just to casually (and whenever they feel like it) fuck with them…with love.

family guy
I’m just fucking with you, bro! One love!

It was the KKK…yes, those motherfuckers again! They came out with a very popular movie for our grandfathers in 1915, a movie called “Birth Of A Nation” ( more like birth of a Fornication, or in plain English, birth of a fuckup). Like many racist themes, there is some truth to it, which of course is wrapped in thick stinky lies. But the partial truth made this fried-chicken thing a top trending topic for our grandparents.

punching your face
Yeah…I can see my face somewhere…

The truth is, for the most part, black people were poor back in the early 1900s. So chicken’s easy to feed, cheap and is finger-licking great meat. The KKK, who would have thought this of half-naked grown-ass men wearing nothing but bedsheets for outfit, used table manners to poke fun at black people. You see, chicken is best eaten with bare-naked hands… just don’t tell your high born British douche. And the other truth is when you’re poor, you probably haven’t eaten for days, so guess what you’ll do to the lucky fried chicken the first chance you get… (hint it won’t be pretty).

won't be pretty

So why do black people still love fried chicken today?

1. It’s been passed on through holiday family dinners and get-togethers. The more you eat something…

“You don’t want to eat? Don’t you know your great granddaddy survived on nothing but chicken and cussing? if he hadn’t eaten his (spinach?,No) chicken and cussed people out all day long for release, you wouldn’t be here, you funky little man?” i know you
Fuck! Do we know each other?…

2. All poor people, black or white, love chicken because it’s one of cheapest foods. They still love fried chicken because fried food is the most delicious of all poor-people, or non-rich people foods (just ask McDonald’s).


Calling black people Fried chicken would be like calling:

the Germans, “turnip greens eating Schwarzy kins” (they loved it during the war, they had nothing better),

No, eat your greens first, Schwarzy!

or calling Canadians “shellfish reeking nordics” because poor Canadians would hide shellfish in their cloths or bury it in their backyard so their neighbours wouldn’t know they were poor and couldn’t afford anything else),

canada shellfish
Sneaky Canadians

or calling the French, “cats and dogs eating motherfuckers” on top of being voracious smelly cheese consumers. During the war, French Cafes served during the war…and it wasn’t actually just for the poor…they all loved it. Bon Appetit!

I know…just stop fucking eating cats and dogs already!